So welcome to the first installment of Mara and Alicia...DON'T EAT IT. Thanks to Steve, we have this great (or not so great) idea of trying ridiculous and often unidentifiable foods and letting you know what they're like so you don't have to.
So this isn't technically the first one, but let's tell you a little about the process.
Wegman's. You make this whole thing possible. So we we were parooozing the aisles of this food paradise when we came upon a sketchy fridge at the end of the frozen aisle. It contained a variety of "drinks" created by GOYA and other brands we couldn't read. BAM. Inspiration. So we grabbed us a few bottles of tamarind and coconut soda and headed out to try them. Not bad. Mostly sugar, kinda tasted alike but generally harmless. Too harmless.
So today we decided to go head first into this project. GOYA vs. Mara and Alicia, round 1. Back to the GOYA aisle for some "tasty" treats. The two that stood today you ask? Green spiky ball drink, also known as Guanabana and a good ol' tinfoil cup of single serve caramel custard flan snack. What is a Guanabana...good question. No idea...but when we cracked open the can, it was eerily opaque. A sort of white cloudy liquid. My taste buds already say "no thank you GOYA." We each took a daring sip and had to make a face. It was sugary and blandly bitter, with a sort of musty twang. Kinda like if you put mothballs in a blender with a splash of corn syrup and sadness. The flan? Well, it was lumpy. Like a blob of brown old rice pudding. Little lumps, so you couldn't chew them and had to let them slide down on their own. Had a fairly pleasant caramel flavor but the texture screamed creamy cellulite. Overall, edible.
Well GOYA, I guarantee we will meet again as you have plenty of creepy treasures left to share with us. You may have won today, but this isn't over. GOYA 1, Mara and Alicia 0.
P.S. We're in a fight.
No comments:
Post a Comment